two kinds of trust

If you've ever had a dispute around trust, it may help to recognize there are at least two types.

1) Trust in a person's good intentions
2) Trust in a person's ability

You must trust in a person's good intentions before you can love them. This is the traditional notion of trust in relationships.

However, you do not have to trust in someone's ability to do something to love them.

For example, if a child desires to drive your car, you can distrust their ability to drive and just drive for them out of continued love for them (or fear for their safety).

Another example: If someone exclaims in outrage at you, "You're not trusting me!" you could be trusting in that they have good intentions, but not trusting in that what they are doing is best for the circumstances. So you could explain this distinction - that you do trust their good intentions, but simply are doubtful that their methodology is the best avenue available.

Recognizing these two kinds of trust can help resolve disputes around trust issues. Once again, this is all about creating the right vocabulary so people can communicate better.